DOGS LIVE HERE...

If you don't want to be greeted with paws and swinging tails don't come inside because dogs live here.
If you don't like the feel of a cold nose or a wet tongue, don't come inside because dogs live here.
If you don't want to step over many scattered toys, don't come inside because dogs live here.
If you think that a home ought to smell of perfume, don't come inside because dogs live here.
If you don't mind all of this, you will be instantly loved when you come inside, because dogs live here.

Author Unknown 

 

 

The 10 Commandments

(from the dog's perspective)

1. My life is likely to last 10-15 yrs., any separation from you will be very painful.

2. Give me time to understand what you want from me.

3. Place your trust in me - It is crucial for mw well being.

4. Don't be angry with me for long, and don't lock me up as punishment. You have your work, your friend, your entertainment, I only have you.

5. Talk to me even if I don't understand your words, I understand your voice when it's speaking to me.

6. Be aware that however you treat me, I'll never forget it.

7. Before you hit me, remember that I have teeth that could have easily crushed the bones in your hand, but I chose not to bite you.

8. Before you scold me for being uncooperative, ask yourself if something might be bothering me, perhaps I'm not getting the right food, maybe I've been out in the sun too long, or my heart may just be getting old and weak.

9. Take care of me when I get old, you too will grow old.

10. Go with me on the difficult journeys, never say,"I can't bear to watch it" or "Let it happen when I'm not there". Remember everything is easier for me when you are there. Remember I Love You

 

 

THINGS DOGS MUST REMEMBER



I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.

I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.

I will scootch my bottom along the grass to rid myself of hangers-on.

I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.

I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE
entering the house.

I will not drop soggy tennis balls in the underwear of someone who is sitting on the toilet.

I will not roll my head around in other animals' poop.

I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it.

I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to throw up.

I will not throw up in the car.

I will not roll on dead birds, seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.

I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.

"Kitty box crunchies" are not food.

I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing.

The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end.

I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.

I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging.

When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside.

We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.

I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the backyard with it.

The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps.

My head does not belong in the refrigerator, dishwasher or trashcan.

I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and car registration.

I will not spend more than 5 minutes trying to find the "perfect" place to poop.

I will not eat other animals' poop.

I will not take off while on leash to chase squirrels while Mommy is standing on a slippery grass slope.